Stop Counting Calories

I'm not a diet fanatic.  I'm also not much of an exercise fanatic.  (Of course, I try not to be fanatical anyway--just relax....)  But I've been thinking a lot about the popular trend toward calorie counting--calories we eat and calories we burn.  I've heard several times that it's all a math equation--take in less than you put out, and you'll lose weight.  This may work, but I'm not sure it's the healthiest way to look at things.  

I think it's more about what you do and what you eat than it is about calories.  Something that is low in calories and low in nutrition isn't going to do you much good.  Isn't it better to eat something that is higher in calories, but healthy?  Full of good, useful calories instead of empty calories? 

And as far as burning calories goes, the common methods used to calculate how many calories you burn aren't accurate.  I've been using an app to keep track of the calories I've burned, but I mostly use it as a motivational tool.  My phone has a little icon on the front screen that reads how many calories I burn each week, and I mostly use it as a reminder to somehow fit exercise into my crazy days.  But I've noticed that it doesn't have a screen that includes a calculation of my muscle mass, or my body's fat percentage.  Can it accurately calculate how many calories I've burned without that information?  When I do an hour of pilates, it tells me I've burned 250 calories or so, but pilates makes me sweat as much as a weight training class--I am, after all, lifting my own weight in pilates, and that means I work harder than the skinny girl next to me.  Heavier people burn more calories going for a walk than thin people do because they have more weight to carry.  On the flip side, muscle tissue burns calories, so the more muscle mass you have, the faster you're going to burn calories.  I have a nephew who was a weight lifter and a diabetic, and he burned through his calories so quickly that he had to eat all day, or he was in trouble. Also, we burn calories constantly, even sitting down and working on the computer.

To sum up, the devices that attempt to count how many calories you burn can't possibly account for every calorie.  So, if you're trying to consume fewer calories than you are burning, and the calculation devices can't determine how many calories you're burning--and their estimate is probably very low--then you just might be eating less than you should. 

Any time I try to be a calorie-counting fanatic, I fail miserably.  I get hungry.  I binge.  I crave all the wrong foods because I'm denying myself something that makes me happy, and that rebellious streak comes up to bite me. 

So, I think I've found the solutions for me. Practical solutions.

-Exercise.  There are many benefits to exercise besides burning calories.  Weight bearing exercises strengthen bones as well as muscle, which is especially important for middle-aged women like me. Increase muscle mass--not in a fanatical, crazy way--so that metabolic rates are higher, and the body is more efficient.  Change up the routines--try a bit of everything.  Kick boxing, pilates, yoga, swimming, hiking, team sports, zumba, walking.  You plateau when you do the same thing over and over.  Routines are easier, and sometimes they are necessary (says the mother of a girl with autism), but shaking things up is better for your body and your mind. 

-Take vitamins.  Any exercise/diet program I've done works better when I'm taking vitamins. 

-Eat a whole grain, low sugar diet.  Well-rounded meals--including whole grains, a bit of protein, veggies and fruit--make me feel better.  If I eat well, then an occasional treat isn't going to hurt me.  Sugar is worse for us than fat, and there is sugar in everything now.  Even ketchup.  Sad, huh?  Again, I'm not fanatical.  I refuse to be.  I enjoy food, and I'm not going to deny myself too much.  I'm just going to eat smarter and eat until I'm not hungry anymore instead of eating until I'm full.  Also, we need to keep in mind that controling blood sugar is the most important thing we can do with our diets.  That's important whether we've been diagnosed with diabetes or not.  Sugar imbalance in our blood is also responsible for how quickly we pack on fat, and how hard that fat is for our bodies to break down.

-Drink water.  I love soda, but my body works better when I drink more water than soda.  And I always drink diet soda when I do drink it.  (see sugar discussion above.) Of course, there are arguments against artificial sweeteners.  I'm not sure what the answer is on those.  In many areas in my life, I just have to pick my battles, and because of my circumstances, I'm more worried about the battle with sugar than I'm worried about the battle with aspartame.  I may live to regret that, but we never know anyway.....

Practical, liveable, realistic.  Anything I do has to be practical, liveable, and realistic, or it won't last long.  My cholesterol dropped 50 points in the past year because of these changes in my lifestyle.  I haven't lost a bunch of weight, but I've lost enough that people have noticed and I'm wearing some of my daughters' clothes.  And when it comes down to it, it's about feeling healthy, having energy, and being able to be what I need to be for the people in my life--including myself. 

Think Pink! Cancer Sucks!

My mother-in-law has cancer again.  This is her second fight with breast cancer, and she will find out today how aggresive the fight is going to be.

Praying for you, Mom!

In His Hands

I'm convinced that I am in His hands. We are all in His hands.

At the end of the school year last spring, I had the opportunity to take a job in the library. I had a hard time deciding. It would make a financial difference, but I loved my job in the computer lab and I wasn't sure it was worth the small difference it would make. I was concerned about the change in my schedule. There were a lot of unknowns. Ultimately, I prayed about it and felt good about it so I took it.

All summer I had moments of doubt, wondering if I'd made the right choice. There are lots of things I miss about the computer lab.

We started the school year and a wonderful woman in my ward was hired to take over the computer lab. My concerns and my need to hold on to the lab melted away. I don't even think about it anymore until someone asks me a question. It's amazing how quickly it happened.

We went through the stuff with Kira's surgery, and she healed quickly. She's still healing quickly.

A couple of days before Kira's surgery, I found out that my partner in the library was going through a really difficult time--her husband was having complications with his cancer and they are going to have to do something drastic. She has been wondering if she will have to quit her job. Since we are part time, she doesn't have long term leave. If she wants to leave for longer than 15 work days, she has to quit. She doesn't want to quit. Today she came to work, trying to figure out a way to keep her job while she takes care of her family.

I am so grateful that I was prompted to take this job. I'm making a little more money, I'm enjoying my job, I'm not worried about the computer lab, all my concerns about the schedule have worked out, and I'm helping my co-worker. Because the schedule has worked out, I am flexible enough that I can help her. Hopefully my help will be enough for her to be able to keep her job.

It just hit me today that the Lord is watching out for us. Through small and simple things are great things brought to pass. You just never know how your prayers will be answered, or how you can be the means to answer someone else's prayer.

I'm so grateful!

Surgery Part 2

This afternoon, they removed the vascular malformation in Kira's lip! They took her in just after 3 and told me it would be about an hour and a half. For a couple of hours before the surgery, Kira was more miserable than she's been this whole time. She was crying and nervous and starving. She hadn't eaten since about 8 pm last night, and it was finally getting to her. All we could do as she requested food was tell her no. It was really hard.

Anyway, I went to grab a bite to eat as soon as they took her in--since I couldn't eat in front of her while she wasn't able to eat. When I finished my lunch/dinner, I went up to the waiting room, thinking I'd be there for forty-five minutes or so. Fifteen minutes later, I saw the doctor enter the waiting room! He told me it was "simple". The tissue he removed was about the size of a marble, and he sent it to pathology. (That's standard procedure when they remove tissue. It's been in her body since birth, so it's not likely abnormal or anything. I doubt pathology will have much to say about it.) I've got to call pathology in a week.

Because the surgery only took an hour, I was extra anxious to see her, mostly because I was excited. She had a hard time waking up, so it was another 45 minutes before I actually got to go into post op.

She was very groggy for a while, and her face is bruised. She looks like she got beaten up. The right side of her face has a bruise up her cheek. Her lip is still very swollen. She has many stitches on the underside of her lip. Now the worry is infection. She is allergic to penicillin and keflex, so there is only one other antibiotic she can use. They gave her a dose of it during surgery. She is also on lortab.

I have to bring her back to see the surgeon in 3 weeks for follow up.

On the upside, she can't seem to get enough food! The first thing she said when she came out of anesthetic was, "Food", the second thing was, "Water". The third thing was, "You have four eyes." :)

Of course, when it rains, it pours. Russ just called to tell me that Jessi had her third seizure today. What timing, huh? At least we're already here. If she needs emergency care, we know just where to take her. *sigh*

Thanks to all of you for your prayers and well wishes! We need all the help we can get, and we have felt the comfort of your prayers! We have the best friends and family in the world!

Surgery Part 1

Everything went well yesterday. We got to the hospital just before noon and they got us in just after one. They hardened the malformed blood vessel, and now her lip is at least three times bigger than it's ever been. I'll post pictures if Kira is okay with it, but I won't post them until she's done and feeling better about things. Her lip is big and purple and hard. Poor thing.

She came out of anesthesia really well, and she was starving. Her first order to "room service" was 2 sausages, a side salad, and a bowl full of sliced pickles. :)

After she had some food in her tummy, she bounced around the hospital like a kid on holiday. I think she believes this place is more like a hotel than a hospital. (We're at Primary Children's). She's had fun dragging me around everywhere. Jason was going to spend the first night with her, but his throat has been sore so we thought it best for me to spend the night. It's been nice to be able to focus on Kira and Kira alone. It's a shame she had to go through this to give me three days to focus on her! I guess that's the way it goes, though. In here, the rest of my life has to be put on hold. In a way, it's nice.

She'll have the second procedure this afternoon, and they'll remove the hardened vessel. I have a feeling that she won't be quite as bouncy after this procedure. She'll definitely have more pain to deal with, and therefore more drugs. We'll see if they'll actually let her leave by 10 tomorrow morning, with the procedure happening so late in the afternoon. Originally, I thought they would be able to cut her lip on the underside. Now, I don't know how they'll do that since her lip isn't flexible. They may cut along the line of her lip or along the natural dimple beneath her nose. I haven't actually talked to a doctor yet, so I don't know. We'll find out in about two to three hours! Hopefully things will go as smoothly today as they went yesterday.

Thanks, everyone, for your thoughts and prayers. It's a privilege to feel so loved and feel the warmth and support so many of you have for our family! Thanks! I love you all!

Surgery Eve

What a day!

I like knowing that everything is set, ready to go, pre-authorized, and prepared. I called LAST WEEK to make sure that our insurance had Kira's surgery and the procedure preceding it pre-authorized. They had the surgery pre-authorized, but not the procedure. I called the doctor and told them, and they said the doctor in charge of the procedure (a radiologist) was supposed to do it. I told the surgeon's office that the radiology procedure hadn't been pre-authorized and asked if they would check on that for me. They said they would.

Today, in an effort to double check, I called the insurance again today. They were having technical difficulties with their phone system and I was disconnected about 6 times and never got through. So I called the surgeon's office again and asked them about the pre-authorization and they said that they would check. (Apparently they didn't check when I called last week.) I called back later to see how things were going and she told me that she found out that the referring surgeon's office was supposed to get preauthorization for the radiology procedure, not the radiologist. Yes, today is one day before the procedure is supposed to happen. She had to fax the information over to my insurance and it is currently before a review board.

Did I mention this procedure is supposed to happen tomorrow? And it's supposed to be followed by an overnight stay in the hospital that the radiology department apparently knows nothing about?

I got to 4:30 and didn't know anything about what was going on, since no one had returned my calls--was I supposed to have Kira fast? What time is she supposed to be there tomorrow? Where do I go? Etc. So I made a few phone calls before 5:00 hit. I know a little more--radiology, 1:00--but if the pre-authorization doesn't go through, we have to reschedule, or pay for it all out of pocket and I guarantee that's not going to happen. After all we've gone through to get this scheduled with my job, Jason's job, school, carpools, etc! GRR!

Arranging this whole thing has been one headache after another. I've had to be the pushy mother--and I hate being pushy--in order to get things done and find things out, from test results to insurance matters. I can't believe what a pain in the butt it has been, or what a pain in the butt I have been--to get this to happen, and there are still no guarantees that I won't call at noon tomorrow only to find out it has to be rescheduled. I think I will freak out if that happens!

I hope the procedure and surgery go infinitely better than the planning has gone! And I hope Kira is happy with the results! I hope the problem will really be solved and she won't get an infection or anything! I hope she isn't scarred afterwards! Argh, the anxiety!

Slow Anxiety

This will be a big week.

It's never fun to have your child go under the knife. I remember when Jessi had an emergency surgery 3 years ago this October. Her ovary was twisted and her fallopian tube had filled with fluid. It caused her great pain, and after hours at the emergency room and being told she might have ovarian cancer, she was taken to primary's for an emergency exploratory surgery. They were able to fix the problem, and to my knowledge, she hasn't suffered from such pain since.

It's funny how you remember scenes from traumatic moments in your life. I can still picture them rolling her down the hall on a gurney toward the operating room, and she turned her head back to look at us and reached for us. She didn't understand what was happening, and we were completely helpless to take away her pain or explain what was happening to her.

This surgery is different than that one was. We've been able to prepare Kira for what the surgery is for, what will happen, how long she will stay in the hospital. After this surgery is over, Kira will no longer have the deformity that has bothered her so much over the years. We've visited with the doctor who will do the surgery, and I trust him.

This time, instead of a sharp stab of anxiety, I've had it spread over a number of days.

As uncomfortable as this is, I must admit I like it better!